The Lonely Dance by Janet Elliott Brown

Slowly, the fog swirls around me. It is the fog born of sudden loss. The shock comes even in the knowing of death. The soul is moving gently as it begins the lonely dance of acceptance. That melancholy song that plays just for me.

I am reaching for the rope that will pull me up, out of the fog. I have  moments of surrender when forgetfulness lingers briefly.
To forget, is only to remember again, and again, and again.

When I remember, there is a quick and immediate swelling of sorrow. The sorrow expands inside me until I worry that it will burst wide open and all of me will be poured out. Loss has pulled me under, down into the darkness of my soul.

Hope struggles to breathe life into me, and soon the fog of loss dissipates. Slowly, gently it lifts, and I find myself rising to the surface. And I am back, standing in the light of day.

Happy Little Rain Dance by Janet Elliott Brown

The wind has had its way with my hair. Feeling it blow on my face.  Music drifts in and out on the breeze. Just listening to the sounds of summer floating thru the trees.

The boats in the harbour, anchors down, gently rocking. Like a lullaby, the water slaps the sides, slap, slap slap. I think I hear a sound like fairies talking.

Off the water on the shore, swaying in perfect syncopation, are the blades of grass and amber waves of grain. See them bow and do their happy little thank you dance for the rain. 

When You Meet a Jimbo by Janet Elliott Brown

They aren't confused by who they are. They know. What confuses them is how people treat them. The cruelty of adults can emotionally devastate a child who already deals with being different. Adults only hurt them with their judgements. I say, if we ain't walked in their shoes, we have no business judging who they are. I actually believe judging is best left up to God. Trust me, if He wants to send a message to them, He will. He won't need judgements made by anyone else to know who to convict or not.

Unless we are God, who are any of us to judge them. To question someone else we know nothing about?  Why is it people always pick people that are different from them to judge and then bring the Bible into it to vindicate their sin of judging others? There are PLENTY of sins out there that you and I are just as guilty of and they are talked about a lot more often in the Bible than the sins of little children being different from them.

These kids know who they are. GOD CHOSE EVERY CELL IN THEIR BODIES AND HE IS PERFECT. HE CREATED THEM PERFECT JUST AS THEY ARE. Guess who used to be perfect like these kids and is not so perfect now. You.

Maybe it is because you don't want to look at the sins you commit every day. Like the sin of judging others. Oops. Forgot, what about the sin of not loving others? Lack of compassion? Empathy? How about you guys look in the mirror.

I would imagine God reads all your posts. You guys seem to be confused about how a Christian is supposed to talk and act? If you think God wants you out there attacking others with your personal judgements and do it in His name, think again.

Your comments, posts and every single thought you have, is written on God's heart. You wound him greatly. Your messages are ugly. Pray for forgiveness. You stir up negativity everytime you post something. WWJD is totally lost on you. You must be so jaded and sick at heart that you have no idea as to how Jesus would handle himself if he were you. Good luck, pal.

Have a blessed day. 

The Very Thing by Janet Elliott Brown

Maybe getting the air knocked out of you, is the very thing your lungs need to remind them how much they love to breathe.

Something to ponder... by Janet Elliott Brown

Ponderings by Janet

Each day, we will make a new memory. Without even thinking about it, memories are made. The most important memories, along with the oddest recollections, happiest, saddest and most prolific memories will last for the rest of our lives.

Our memories are often interlaced with someone else's. So what happens to us and how we feel about it becomes a memory; our memory. Simultaneously, a memory is also be created by whomever might  witness or participate.

What we experience: morphs into memories and emotions

What we experience with someone else: is a shared memory, the same experience with different emotions for each of us

So we may be making a memory for ourselves, someone else, or both, right this very second. In this very moment.

Something to ponder...

Life by Janet Elliott Brown

When in high school, we had debates. We were encouraged to debate current issues, like the Viet Nam war or women's rights. On FB, many people think that talking about important issues is a no-no. If one does that, they are looked at as dissidents. Yes, dissidents. How does tyranny begin? Subtly. With fear and intimidation tactics. 

I will not just sit idly by, going along with laws being made that actually hurt 75% of the people in our country. 

So many people have banned themselves from participating in any discussion that is controversial - so they can remain politically and socially correct so as not to offend anyone. Let's not ruffle feathers, right.

Is that the least bit offensive to anyone besides me?  I am not an overly political person, but it is my responsibility as an American to speak up, to stand up, to question things and to talk about them. I want to apologize to anyone that takes offense at this post, in advance.

I wondered if more of our tax money each year is spent on welfare or big business. So, of course, I googled it. This is an older article, but it supports my theory. Why are folks mad at the people "stealing" their tax money; "illegal aliens" or those on food stamps, medicare, etc., instead of being mad about big business welfare? Much more of "their" tax dollars go into the billionaire and trillionaire peoples' pockets. Big businesses are made up of people lining their own pockets with the taxes paid in by all of us.

I have actually had people say such hateful, cruel things about the poor, and those in need, and much worse and more selfish things than one could imagine. People just need to "work as hard as THEY do so nobody uses (steals) the taxes they pay. Americans going hungry are not their problem. Kids without food, shoes and school books, women/girls that need planned parenthood, etc., are using their money. Those in need of help should save themselves. That's what I have been told several times by people that I love very much. 

Some of my friends, those with the most influence, have personally decided to NOT stand up or speak up, and that is sad for all of us.

Ding! Ding! Ding! The floor is now open for debate (not name-calling or fighting). Your thoughts, please?

So, here is my topic for debate:

From Wikipedia:  Tyranny of the majority (or tyranny of the masses) refers to an inherent weakness of direct democracy and majority rule in which the majority of an electorate can place its own interests above, and at the expense of, those in the minority. This results in oppression of minority groups comparable to that of a tyrantor despot.^[1]

Potentially, through tyranny of the majority, a disliked or unfavored ethnic, religious, political, social, or racial group may be deliberately targeted for oppression by the majority element acting through the democratic process.^[2]

American founding father Alexander Hamiltonwriting to Jefferson from the Constitutional Convention argued the same fears regarding the use of pure direct democracy by the majority to elect a demagogue who, rather than work for the benefit of all citizens, set out to either harm those in the minority or work only for those of the upper echelon. The Electoral College mechanism present in the indirect United States presidential electionsystem, and the phenomenon of faithless electors allowed for within it, was, in part, deliberately created as a safety measure not only to prevent such a scenario, but also to prevent the use of democracy to overthrow democracy for an authoritarian, dictatorial or other system of oppressive government.^[3] As articulated by Hamilton, one reason the Electoral College was created was so "that the office of President will never fall to the lot of any man who is not in an eminent degree endowed with the requisite qualifications".

Did I Change by Janet Elliott Brown

I seriously don't know why or how my beliefs are so much different than my friends and family. It seems we do have the past in common, but not the present or the future.

That has really been bothering me and I find myself questioning myself and wondering how I ended up on the wrong side of the issues from the majority of my friends.

Lately, I have made an effort to NOT speak up for my beliefs because I am losing my friends and their respect for me. The differences are real and cut deep into my heart. I am pretty sure that they are questioning the value of my friendship and avoiding me. I am very sad about this, but in the end, we are all alone when we leave this earth.

Until this year, I never knew how very different I am from them. We truly do not share common ground at all, just past experiences. I wonder if we ever really did. I have been very confused about this.

Many of the differences are in how we feel about other humans and how we want our country to treat other human beings. I do not see the poor and downtrodden as thieves, drug addicts, drunks, lazy, violent and worthless - all taking advantage of the system and stealing their tax dollars. I do not believe that everyone needing food stamps, disability, social security, etc., is bad. 

Welfare seems to be a dirty, shameful word to them. They say that people in bad situations that need help should have worked harder LIKE THEY DID/DO, been smarter, gone to school, done this, or done that instead of stealing their money (the portion of taxes paid by them.) They have little compassion for anyone on welfare and label them they are all the same - bad.

This is what welfare actually means:
wel·fare
ˈwelˌfer
noun
the health, happiness, and fortunes of a person or group.
"they don't give a damn about the welfare of their families"
synonyms: well-being, health, comfort, security, safety, protection, prosperity, success, fortune; More statutory procedure or social effort designed to promote the basic physical and material well-being of people in need.
"the protection of rights to education, housing, and welfare"
NORTH AMERICAN
financial support given to people in need.

What's a bleeding heart liberal girl to do?

Make a New Path by Janet Elliott Brown

Whatever man puts in your way, God will clear away or just make a new path for you. Once upon a time, I thought life got easier the older we get. I was wrong. We just have to learn to keep overcoming. I say to myself, "Be like the water, that takes the path of least resistance. If the rock won't move, simply flow around it." You end up in the same place, but the journey is the reward. Not the destination. But, in the last year, as my health improves, one might think that relationships would improve to a point that there would be no drama or pain. Guess what. Wrong again. When we open ourselves up to allow others into our world, with them comes their problems, drama and baggage. If they have throw out their rocks as we have, that is wonderful. But in my experience, that is rarely the case. So I have gotten very picky and more reclusive when it comes to who I include in my life. It is not that I can't handle it, it is more that I don't want to revert to a place I already dug myself out of. Some say that is selfish, but I am happier and less stressed out and more comfortable in my skin. I don't know what is right for them, but for me, peace and quiet and simple things are what I need to have in order to be who I was born to be. Myself. Stay true to yourself. Hold fast to your peace. Avoid stress and drama. Things will improve. I know this because you deserve only the best! I love you!

Momentous Moments by Janet Elliott Brown

One defining moment in my life could only happen because of another defining moment. In school, I had a hard time when we moved here from Michigan in the 4th grade. I almost failed math and my handwriting was so bad that my teacher wouldn't put my paper on the board with everyone else's for Open House. I had really tried to improve on both of them, but barely passed with a D- that year. So, at the age of 9, I decided that I just was not smart. I eventually stopped trying to make 'good' grades. Instead, I skated by and passed every year and graduated early with not a bit of confidence. I knew I would fail the SATs, etc., so I went to business school instead of college. So, at age 9, that wasn't my best defining moment.

Later, in life, I figured out that I could ask questions and, and I could actually 'learn' anything. Although I thought I couldn't get into a real college, over the years I did do well. At about age 50, after succeeding at work, I took a job with a company that took IQs and testing seriously. Not knowing this beforehand, I showed up for work and spent the day 'testing'. They never mentioned my scores after that. A few months later, my boss told me the execs used to be in Mensa. She casually commented about my test scores being the second highest in the company. I told her that couldn't be right. She said it was true.

By that time in my life, I was in a pretty good place, but I couldn't help thinking how I had held myself back for my entire life - because of a wrong thought about myself. It might have been that being born into a really big family, no one actually saw me. Who knows.

I re-defined myself over the  next decade and my lightbulb moment showed me how important self esteem is to one's success in life. We truly are what we think we are. Think well.

So, in reality, there were several defining moments in that part of the story of my life.

The One and Only by Janet Elliott Brown

There she stands with her back so stiff. She looks so small. Standing there with hands pressed to her sides. Fingers open wide letting it all flow through. Not just the things of truth but also the truth of lies. In the lies I hear the song playing for me. In the lies I hear the melody of the last instrument being put into its case. The silence is the lie because if you listened you would hear the long goodbye.

I am drowning in the sea of lies. Lies I made up for me alone. I believed my lies. Should I not? I made them up for me. I used to think the lies rolled off your tongue but it was me all along. I told myself so many things. How things once were but are not now.

The stories and the laughter and the sweetness as you say her name as she says yours. How do I walk around listening for the sound of the goodbye I could never stay.

There is something in me that knows what must be done. Its time for me to turn the page. Love has left the stage. No bowing to the grave. Just walk away. You've done it many times before. It is done. I no longer want to pretend that you didn't start the end. You did.

I Can Do It by Janet Elliott Brown

Fall is in the air and it is 68° this morning. The squirrels are busy storing up pecans for the winter. They run from tree to tree gathering them. Stopping only long enough to drink from the full water bucket we leave out for all the village wildlife and birds during the hot summer months. The birds usually entertain us. They normally serenade us with their songs, but today they are quiet. Have they started their long journey to their winter vacation getaways? I ask myself if I can be more like them. Can I learn to trust my Father to care for me as he does the birds?

I wonder whose influence is stronger in our lives..... Our parents or God? Our parents tended to our every need for the first year of our lives. They teach us to talk, to walk, to hold a spoon and drink from a sippy cup. We are encouraged to do things for ourselves and taught to play on our own. We are encouraged and told that we can do it for ourselves. So we grow up, taking them at their word. We are proud to be told that we are good girls and boys each time we show our independence. We continue to reach out to the people that love and care for us. Then one day, we ask for help and we are told that we are big enough, old enough and capable enough to do it ourselves. We realize that depending on others doesn't earn us that much sought after "good girl or good boy". We begin struggling to do it ourselves. How difficult it becomes to ask for anything.

We say our prayers at night and ask God to protect us and provide for us. But we don't believe he will do it for us. We believe to gain his love, we must do it on our own.

Tomorrow, I Cannot Wait to Greet You

It is a beautifully cool night & the streets are shimmering with the glow of the city's street lights. The air is crisp and clean and the sky fades from midnight blue to stormy grey and back again. 

Through the fog on my window I watched the night swallow up the day. Taking with it the troubles and disappointments, stress and struggles of everyday life, and leaving the hope of a buoyant heart with the gift of tomorrow. 

As for me, I will lift my eyes to the dark night sky and I will know that the moon and stars are still shining unto the heavens. I will lay down my weary body, close my eyes and open my  heart to the magnificence of the universe. I will sleep under a blanket of peace, on a pillow of faith and I will know the sweet comfort of grace. 

Tomorrow, I cannot wait to greet you.

Death Dance of Falling Light by Janet Elliott Brown

I'm not the person that i used to be, although her memory still exists. I'm nothing less, vaguely more. It feels like I am darkly colored in tones of earth and shadow. Through  broken windows, off shards of glass, the evening sky catches the glow of streetlights as they free fall in swirling pandemonium. One might catch a glimpse of me that I used to be. Who really knows if  she is the real me. Could it be, that only now am I the person I was born to be? Momentary reflections of the one I want to be, like particles of lights are bouncing about as if riding on the feet of dancing fairies. Just spheres of light sprinkling trails of  color all around me.

Once upon a time all those drops of color and light formed the picture of me. The picture of me that I see. If only I could see me now, whole and fine. Instead I flicker and gently fall growing dimmer as I float in circles slowly vanishing.

To others, the stillness inside me appears as a beautiful looking glass. They don't see what's behind the polished mirror. The reflections and the smears and tears that have fallen, salty yet sweet.

You Can't Make Them Care

by Janet Elliott Brown

I love you and only want you to think the best of me - no matter what - always. There is nothing more difficult or even more impossible than gaining someones approval that doesn't approve of you. They have already made up their mind about who he thinks you are. No matter what you do, or think, or want/enjoy/dream about something...no matter how you feel - they feel nothing for you. They choose not to approve of you, so there is nothing you can do to change that.  You cannot make them care if they have no empathy or feeling for you. They do not relate, understand or care at all about your emotions....nothing about you touches them. They choose not to acknowledge your interests, desires, etc.

It is so clear now. I never hear your voice on the other end of the line. Your calls do not have my number on them. Your thoughts no longer are released to me on the breath that you take. I will never be that person again. You speak only to the ones you love the most. That isn't me. 

I am changed, just a little bit, each time I come across a thought or quote that sheds a new light on an old place in my mind. A place that I have visited more times than I can count, yet I wasn't able to see what I see so clearly now. The words can be simple and few, deeply dramatic or seemingly silly in their insights. There is no obvious reason that I receive a different message though each has been said in many different  ways by many different people. by Janet Elliott Brown

 

The best people possess a feeling for beauty, the courage to take risks, the discipline to tell the truth, the capacity for sacrifice. Ironically, their virtues make them vulnerable; they are often wounded, sometimes destroyed. — Ernest Hemingway

Some cause happiness wherever they go, others whenever they go. ― Oscar Wilde

The Breaks and the Broken

by Janet Elliott Brown

There are things we do in our lifetimes that change us. Not always for the better. We are free to choose, but we alone are responsible for the consequences of those choices. There are certain choices that we make that define us if we keep repeating them. It is our choices, and the depth of the damage we cause that determine who we are and, just as importantly, who stays or goes in our lives. If we wreak havoc on those we hold dear, we set in motion a domino effect that alters our present and our future course. It's the   choices we make  repeatedly, that cause breaks and brokenness. At that point, it is no longer a mistake. It is a moral character flaw. It says everything about who we are. When the results of the choices we make hurt another human being, we are guilty of changing them. That is a heavy burden to carry. Hurting others repeatedly speaks volumes. It says we value our desires and wishes above the good of others.

That goes against all that is good, right, and just. By repeating hurtful mistakes, we lose everything for the sake of self gratification. We begin to poison everyone and that poison bleeds into every gift that God created in us. It takes a strong will to conquer the selfish drive to get what we want. It takes heroic efforts to right our wrongs. And just like the repetitive mistakes that define us, we must repeatedly make the right choices to become again the person we are born to be.

When I'm Gone

by Janet Elliott Brown

You won't even miss me when I'm gone. I will steal away on  gentle breezes outside the window. I will drift upon the wings of what might have been, as you sit there at your desk studying notes and numbers that will be meaningless in a few short weeks. You won't hear me singing sweetly, no lullabies or songs of you and me. All you'll hear is the silence of the door you never opened.

Do Not

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Janet Brown

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Jan 14, 10:18 AM

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Of all the many 'do nots' in the Bible, I guess we can hold this one to the utmost high. Thou shalt not steal.

I am not perfect in any way. Not one cell of me is perfect. I sin even when I am sleeping. I sin without thinking. I judge without conscious thought. Yet, in my human-ness, I can only know Jesus from in my heart. I cannot judge anyone's relationship with God, but mine. I can only guess when asked 'what would Jesus do?' I cannot know the answers for you. I feel God's love for me. It is real. It is tangible because my heart swells with his love when I am in pain, feel joy and also sadness. Many things confuse me, but one thing I am sure of. My God, the one who created me, who has loved me since before I was born, the God who speaks to my heart of love, charity, compassion and goodness, He has touched my heart with discernment, perception in the absence of judgment with a view to obtaining spiritual direction and understanding. Of all the sinners Jesus died for, will God forsake the one that stole bread for his hungry family? No, he won't. My God would be more focused on helping him. His thoughts and judgements will be much harsher on the people that could have helped the man in his suffering, but didn't. His anger will be directed towards the bitter taxpayers and the greedy tax collectors. My God knows the heart of every man. My relationship with God is close. It goes no further than my hand when held right in front of my face. What is on the other side of my hand, is not my concern. All the rest is not about me. It is about God's relationships with everyone else. I prefer not to quibble about technicalities, but instead I try to focus on what Jesus did. I want to be like Him. If the man took a piece of bread, Jesus would give him the whole loaf.

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To Give or Not to Give, That is the Question.

Proverbs 6:30 Men do not despise a thief, if he steal to satisfy his soul when he is hungry;
(30) Men do not despise a thief . . .—A man who is driven to theft by poverty is more worthy of pity than disdain; not so the adulterer. Again, the thief can make retribution, while the adulterer can have none to offer.

Thinking about the morality of judging other "sinners". First, use deontological ethics. In this approach, moral responsibility is seen in terms of duties or obligations. Use the perspective of virtue ethics. This framework focuses on whether an action builds moral character. Does the action produce virtues such as fortitude, temperance, prudence and justice? Does it demonstrate courage, resilience, fairness, moderation, a sense of equality and respect for life? Is it sustainable in the long term, making wise use of resources? Although the action of stealing bread does not seem to maximally demonstrate these qualities, its effects in terms of character are likely superior to the given alternative of allowing innocents to starve. Therefore, the action would be morally justified.

So, if we jail the hungry for stealing food, while at the same time cutting all aid to those in need, what happens? The jails fill up with hungry thieves or the poor homeless people starve or freeze on the streets because they had no food to eat or shelter.

Knowledge of His Word does not give us some supernatural means by which we can look into the hearts of our fellow man and determine his motive for doing things. But it does give us an understanding of ourselves as well as of human nature in general. So, in light of the Bible, let us consider the motives behind our words and actions.

Deuteronomy 15:7-8 ESV
John 3:17 ESV
Luke 3:10-11 ESV
And the crowds asked him, “What then shall we do?” And he answered them, “Whoever has two tunics is to share with him who has none, and whoever has food is to do likewise.”
James 2:15-16 ESV

Charity seems to be a dirty word these days. By definition, charity is the voluntary giving of help, typically in the form of money, to those in need. synonyms: financial assistance, aid, welfare, relief, financial relief; Charity adj. Generous in giving money or other help to the needy. adj. Mild or tolerant in judging others; lenient.
Although God said do not judge, there are those among us that judge the poor, needy and downtrodden very harshly. Without knowing the facts and statistics related to tax dollars spent on our health and human services in America, they have judged from their hearts and minds that ALL poor people are lazy, all poor people on welfare are lying about their situations, cheating and stealing their tax dollars. 

Some say, sadly in my opinion, that this isn't their problem. Some say, the poor had the same opportunities as they did, (not true) but unlike them, they made bad choices. Some say, that their tax money is being stolen by people in need and their tax dollars are wasted on lazy bums, addicts, hoodlums, thieves, and 'illegal aliens'. They also look at all foster families as if they are just taking in kids because they are too lazy to work - without one thought of the kids being given a place to live. They can find no good in their opinions of others.

There are people that  judge the hearts of others and they have nothing but disdain, distrust and contempt for the poor. Their money should not be wasted on lesser human beings, worthless men and women that should have planned better. 

I disagree with these judgements. How do others justify making judgements on every person in need without one iota of compassion? What causes this? How will we stand before God with him knowing every judgement formed in our heart and mind, and expect him to overlook all of us sinners that judge the hearts of other men?

This issue gets to me in the uttermost gut. Is it FB that has shown us a side to others that we hadn't seen before; how our friends, family and even strangers really feel on these moral issues? Or is the divide in America just showing its head more because Trump has made it politically correct to display how hard hearted we Americans have become. He has made it a good thing to take from the poor and middle classes. Do we feel now, that we have grounds for showing our true feelings, and our disdain for the struggling man? 

There is something dark and ugly seeping into our country like a slow poison. I pray for all of us. 

The classic problem often posed as, "Would you steal a loaf of bread in order to feed your family?" is what is known as a moral dilemma. In ethics, this is any situation in which an agent has a moral reason to do each of two actions but cannot do both. To solve this problem, you can combine approaches from deontological, utilitarian and virtue ethics.

This includes the range of actions between those that are absolutely prohibited and those that are morally required. The agent in the moral dilemma being considered has a duty not to steal and an obligation to feed his family. Unless there are other means available, this approach would likely yield the conclusion that his obligation to feed his family overrides the moral prohibition against stealing.

Take a utilitarian approach. In utilitarian ethics, an agent is required to do the action that produces the greatest good for the greatest number. Because stealing a loaf of bread would cause relatively little harm, and preventing his family from starving would be a great good, the action of stealing the bread would be morally justified.

Therefore, we can know the things of God because we have the mind of Christ (I Cor. 2:15,16). But, we must ask, how do we use the mind of Christ? The answer is that our Lord Jesus Christ, the living Word of God, manifests Himself to us by means of His written Word, that is, our Bible (John 1:1). The Apostle Paul continually prays that God will give unto us the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him and His understanding, 1that is, the mind of Christ.

“If among you, one of your brothers should become poor, in any of your towns within your land that the Lord your God is giving you, you shall not harden your heart or shut your hand against your poor brother, but you shall open your hand to him and lend him sufficient for his need, whatever it may be.

For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.

If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and filled,” without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that?